Tuesday, December 21, 2010

counting eggs before they hatch

No pun intended. :)

But that's what I've been doing all day long...actually, ever since I took this last round of Clomid. From the beginning, Clif and I have had a really good feeling about this cycle.

It's been a long & stressful few days. I'll start off with tell you all about my adventure last night after work >.<
My parents are out of town - they actually went to the beach and are staying the same place that we stayed. Anyway...we still have snow at our house. And so do my parents. And unfortunately, Clif and I live on a hill, and my parents live at the top of a mountain. Needless to say, it's been slick.

Since my parents are out of town...I was elected to take care of their dog. Her name is Cinnamon. When I got off of work last night, I went to let Cinnamon outside & feed her. (I have my parents SUV, so I was in four wheel drive) I made it three quarters of the way up their mountain and got stuck. I knew I was going to have to back down the mountain. That's not the scary part. I started backing down...and of course I started sliding. I slid into a ditch (thankfully I was able to get out)...and almost over a creek bed. I was pretty shaken up. So I called my mom and told her that I would not be going to check on Cinnamon last night.

Then I went to our house...and tried our driveway. Apparently some of it had started to melt yesterday and then froze back over because I didn't get up our driveway either. And I had to back down it too. But it wasn't as bad...thank God! So I ended up driving to where Clif works and sitting in the parking lot until he got off. :) We tried getting up my parents mountain in Clif's truck...and didn't have any luck either, so we headed home. Thankfully we made it up our driveway.

Here comes the fun part. I had to park my parents SVU at a little church on the road we live on. And it's not really within walking distance...at least not when there is snow covering everything. Clif had to work this morning. He has to be at work at 5:45. So I had to get up at 5am to shower and get ready for the day, so that I could ride down our driveway with him. I arrived at Walmart around 5:30ish!! How crazy is that?? VERY!

Whew. Okay, so then I am driving to the doctors office and I realize...oh no! I forgot my Ovidrel shot! :( I didn't have time to turn around and go home...even if I had...I would have had to walk up the driveway. Geez.

I get to the office 15 minutes early, and they weren't even open yet. So I sat in the hallway until they did. I went in and checked in, and talked to "D", the nice lady who helped us with the insurance company the other day. She told me how excited she was for me that they had agreed to pay for five more visits. She also said that she got smart with the lady at Anthem, because of how they treated me when I called. :)

Yet another nurse came and called me back. She was older, and really sweet. I undressed and waited for Dr S to come in. He got the wand, she turned off the lights and ultrasound started. He was down "there" for literally 5 minutes (the longest of my life, I think)...not saying a word. He'd move the wand to the right, then the left...up, and down. He wouldn't even look at me. Just as "freak out" mode started he asked me if I had emptied my bladder before going back to his office. Uh no...I only had like two sips of sprite. So I had to wrap up in a sheet and head down the hall to the bathroom. He told me that he thought what he was seeing was my bladder, but there was a possibility that it was a very large cyst. Oh.My.Gosh.

I got back to the room, he came back in...and within seconds I was relieved! He said that it was,in fact, my bladder. Apparently he couldn't even see my right ovary because I my bladder was so full :) So...as the panic evaporated...a new feeling set in. Excitement. Why was I excited?? Because right after he told me that what he was seeing was my bladder, he started calling out follicle measurements to the nurse. I HAVE MATURED FOLLICLES!!! Actually, I have like five or six matured follicles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can you tell I'm a little excited?

After he finished checking out the eggs, I got dressed and went in his office. He said that everything looks good... and that the follicles look very healthy, and they are of good size. He asked if I still had my Ovidrel shot, and I explained that I had left it at home. He said that it didn't matter, I will need to give myself the shot tonight...between 7&9. And then he asked if we would be trying to fertilize the little eggies the old fashioned way, or if we wanted the insemination. Before he could hardly get the question out of his mouth I was telling him that we would be back for the IUI. I go back on Thursday at 8:30. I am SO thrilled.

Now...of course I know that this is not (by any means) a done deal. I understand and accept that there is still a possibility that I will not get pregnant this month. BUT...you have to understand, to my knowledge (and the knowledge of many smart doctors)...these are the first eggs my ovaries have produced in almost two years. TWO YEARS!!! Oh my gosh. After they left the exam room, I couldn't keep the tears from coming to my eyes. We've waited SO long for this.

Even if I don't get pregnant this month I am thrilled that I at least produced not one, but 6 (?) eggs!!! SOOOOOOOO excited. :)

When Dr S was calling out the measurements, he called out one...and then was like, "not to be outdone by ___" So apparently he was pretty excited for me...excited that things look so good. I kept thanking him as I was leaving...I told him that this was the best news I had received in a while. :) He said that he knew, and that this day was a long time coming.

All the way to work all I could say was, "thank You Jesus!" I mean...over and over...thank You, Lord. My prayers were answered.

Now we wait. I think that will probably be the hardest thing about it all. And another thing is... that if I do get pregnant this month... we probably will not share it with anyone (except family) for a while...just to make sure everything goes okay. :)

Thanks to every single person who uttered a prayer for us. :) Please keep them up as Thursday approaches, and the weeks to follow. God bless!


Caroline said...

Yay for great things . I'm prayin hard.

Trennia said...

praying..So glad God is in control!

Betty said...

Words cannot say how happy I am for you right now! I cried reading this. I pray that all goes "swimmingly" the rest of the month. LoL!

Shannon said...

Yay Yay Yay Yay. I know the excited feeling of knowing that I had matured follicles. I even blogged about my TWO and a little runt that probably would not "hatch" :) I get it. :) So excited. But like you said, it is not a done deal. So much has to happen to secure a life inside a womb. God is good, and in control! YAY!!!!!!

Sarah said...

this post made me cry! I'll be praying as much as I can :)

Radiant Readhead said...

i am so excited for you!! my prayers are with you, and everything is crossed:-)

Mrs*Popcorn said...

i'm overjoyed for you Desiree!! I will definately continue to keep you in my prayers, and my husband (whom i've told about you before, because you are an inspiration of hope :) ) will probably be praying for you too lol. I told him the good news tonight and he said he feels that God will bless you this time. I am sososoSOOOO excited!!!

AHB said...

This post also made me cry! I am so excited for you..I can remember what it felt like to be in your shoes, and having a good amount of follicles is amazing!! Every follicle means more and more of a chance that one of them will take..or maybe more!! I will be praying that all goes well for you on Thursday!!

belle said...

double and triple prayers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holly said...

yay for follicles!!!! :)

Lindsey said...

Thats so awesome Desiree:) I've been keeping up w your updates, and I'm gonna keep praying for you! Hope you have a wonderful Christmas:)

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