Monday, May 17, 2010

sick and tired...tired and sick.

So I am going to complain a little. :) I don't know what's wrong with me... but I am sick. And it stinks. And on top of that, it's Monday. I hate Monday's. haha!
Man reading that sentence back to myself, I really sound like a brat. BUT, let me start with yesterday...

Yesterday I woke up in a good mood. I felt good, I was light hearted...I just felt good. It's been a really long time since I felt like that. I was excited, even though it was WEIRD. :) I even told Clif about it.

Our second open house was yesterday, and though I was pleased by the outcome, I was upset all the same. First let me say, there was only one couple that came to look at the house. But they stayed for an hour and a half, and really liked the house. Their plans (as of last night) was to put their house on the market, and put a contract on our house saying if they sell within so many days they will buy our house. So that's a blessing. Not really getting my hopes up on this, but it would be awesome if everything worked out.

Now the not so good side of things. Clif worked all day yesterday, and I was at my parents house.
I went home before going back for evening service at church, and found that the Realtors had left the TV on, left food out on the counter, uncovered...AND...(the thing that really upset me) the nursery door was left open.

Don't get me's not like I can't handle going in her room. I do quite often. It's almost a comfort. Her wreath from the hospital hangs on the door, along with the sign I bought in September that says "Lilly's Room". I love her room. When I think of her room, I don't want it to become a place that I can just go into without thinking about it. I don't want to take away from how special it is to me. I don't want it to become common.

Our realtor knows us. His in laws went to chruch with us. He knows that our daughter died, and HOW she died. We told him in the beginning that I was going to have a hard time with letting people go in her room, that if we sold the house, it would be hard leaving it behind. And we also told them that I refuse to make any changes in that room. I will not paint the wall. I will not pack her things up. At least, not until I absolutely have to that is.

First of all, I found it very disrespectful. Second, unprofessional. Maybe I'm being dramatic... maybe I'm not. But this is how I feel about it. It upset me. Needless to say, if we don't sell our house before the six month contract is up - we will not be signing another contract with them.

Needless to say, my Clomid must have finally caught up with my emotions. Last night was horrible, which really upset me because I had been feeling SO good about everything JUST yesterday MORNING. But boy did it change. I won't go into detail, but it was bad. Really bad. :(
I'm at a loss on so many different levels.

Mucinex. :) Yup, I got some. Funny, a fellow blogger told me that I should take Mucinex several days leading up to when I should ovulate. Well, I decided to check with my pharmacist yesterday and see if it would counteract with my Clomid. He said it wouldn't, so I went for it. Funny how I bought it to help with ovulation and fertility, and I get sick the same day. My throat is raw, my nose is eyes are dry. I have a headache and, frankly I feel like poop. :)

But it's Monday... I have a ton of stuff to get done on Monday's. We're still down a staff member, and last weeks problems carried into this week. I couldn't call in. So that's that. Had to go to work, and I just felt like complaining a little bit.

:) Still keeping my chin up, and looking's just a little harder to do today. Maybe the rain is putting a damper on my mood?


Trennia said...

oh,I'm so sorry.
I too am very picky about Emily's stuff, I put her stuff in a curio for protection and I'm really auntsy when people start asking to see her hand molding.I hold it they look,no touching!

Lori said...

So sorry about sweet girl's room being left open...I can't imagine how you must feel knowing random people will walk in there and NOT KNOW....will not know who she was and how precious she is.

Thinking of you and praying you feel better soon!
Lots of love xoxoxo

That corgi :) said...

sorry you aren't feeling well; it is never pleasant to be sick and have to go to work and function somewhat. I hope your house sells as I think that is what your plans are for it. It is sad that people aren't sensitive to respecting your feelings and wishes about things that are special to you, like Lilly's room.

hope you feel better soon!


croleyc69 said...

Sorry you had to deal with all that. {{HUGS}} :)

Trennia said...

send me your address through email I got ya alittle something,hope ya like it.

elena said...

I completely understand your feelings on the door being left open. I'm sorry you are not feeling well. Hope you feel better soon.

love and prayers

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