Wednesday, November 10, 2010

emotional mix up.

So tomorrow morning we leave for the beach. I'm excited... and I'm dreading it at the same time. I really think that it's going to be a good thing...getting away, just the two of us - spending time one on one...during a time that we just need each other.
I am so very thankful that it worked out where we could both have a week off, at the same time, and just be able to escape reality for a while.
This afternoon is going to be a tough one. I'm leaving work early, and Clif and I are going to head to the cemetery. I want to go...I know that I need to go...but I also know that it's going to be emotional. Knowing that I won't be anywhere near here for her birthday. I feel like I'm dishonoring her in a way. But...
No matter where I find myself on November 13th...this year, and in the years to come...I know that I will never be able to escape the memories... and the pain.
I bought some fall-ish flowers, but no flower, real or silk, could ever do her justice. I'm so...lost for words. :) You all will be hearing from me at random over the next few days. If you think of us, say a prayer (or two), we'll be needing them.


croleyc69 said...

Praying for you and thinking of you both. You have crossed my mind so much the past few days thinking of your precious girl Lilly. Glad you could get away together. Have a safe trip and thinking of you both as you go to the cemetary.


Jennifer said...

Praying that the next few days would ge gentle on you!

Holly said...

Thinking of you and hoping that your little getaway is good for both of you.

Trennia said...

Thinking of you both as Lily's birthday is very near, lifting you both up in prayers.In all honesty I don't think your dishonoring her she is always with you in your heart no matter :)

elena said...

Thinking of you both. *hugs*

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